I met her two years ago, and it was like nothing I’d ever felt before. I just knew, instantly, it was her, my other half, my twin flame. Everything was so easy at the start, talking every day, this warm, deep love that felt like home. It was perfect, it really was, I thought I’d finally found the person I was meant to be with forever.
But then things started to change. She’d get scared, she’d pull away, she called herself a runner. She was so afraid of being hurt, and I tried to be patient, I really did, but it created this chaos. We’d be so close, and then she’d just go cold, shut down, give me the silent treatment for days. We broke up and got back together so many times, it was exhausting, but the love was always there, burning through it all. She was the one who told me about twin flames, about how this was a spiritual connection, and I believed it, I felt it in my soul. Our fights were the worst part, we’d argue over nothing, or over everything, and neither of us could even explain why by the end, we’d just be left confused and hurting each other.
The last time, she said I was being cold, that I didn’t love her the right way. We tried to talk about healing, but it just turned into another fight. Then she messaged me, and I was in a bad place, I was partying, using stuff to numb everything, and I ignored her. For days. I didn’t mean to, I was just lost, but it hurt her so much. She finally said it was over for good, that she didn’t love me anymore, that we weren’t twin flames, that she wanted a normal relationship without all this pain. Then she blocked me, everywhere, completely gone.
I don’t know what to do now. The pain is so deep, it’s physical, I’ve thought about not existing anymore just to make it stop. I love her so much, and I hate that I hurt her, I never wanted to do that. I was trying to cope with the chaos and I made it all worse. Now I’m just here, alone, without my other half, and I feel completely lost. I’m using things to escape, which I know is wrong, but the heartbreak is too much to feel straight on. How do you move forward from this? How do you live when the person who felt like your soul has left and says they don’t love you? I need help, I don’t know what steps to take, everything just feels empty and hopeless.
